Thursday, July 28, 2011

10 Reasons not to Jog


1. My grandmother started walking five miles a day 
    when she was 60. She's 97 now & now we don't know 
    where she is.

2. The only reason I would take up jogging is 

     so that I could hear heavy breathing again.

3. I joined a health club last year, spent about 400 bucks.

    Haven't lost a pound. Apparently you have to show up.

4. I have to exercise in the morning 

    before my brain figures out what I'm doing.

5. I don't exercise at all. 

    If God meant us to touch our toes, 
    he would have put them further up our body.

6. I like long walks, especially when they are taken 

    by people who annoy me.

7. I have flabby thighs, but fortunately my stomach covers them.


8. The advantage of exercising every day 

    is that you die healthier.

9. If you are going to try cross-country skiing, 

    start with a small country.

10. I don't jog. It makes the ice jump right out of my glass.

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